Det er så mange ting jeg skulle ønske du forstod. Men jeg kommer ikke til å fortelle deg hva det var, siden du skjønte det aldri og derfor kommer du aldri til å skjønne det heller. Jeg vil heller høre på stillheten din fremfor unnskyldningene dine. Selv om jeg vil at du skal snakke, jeg vil at du skal snakke for alltid, til meg. Jeg ville ha hørt på vært eneste ord, hvert eneste ord som du hadde visket, skreket eller sagt til meg. Men å be deg snakke for alltid er som å ønske seg regn, midt i en ørken.
Det var en kjærlighets historie, du og jeg. Eller, jeg ville at det skulle være det. Men det endte akkurat som i eventyrene, utenom den lykkelige slutten. Jeg skal ikke gråte, jeg skal ikke kaste bort tårer på deg. Men hvor lenge skal dette vare, denne følelsen av tomhet? Jeg blir rastløs av den.
Men ingenting kan sammenlignes som når du holder rundt meg, selv om det er som en venn eller med kjærlighet.
I don’t know how to react when I se you. Sometimes I wish I didn’t saw you, so I wouldn’t stand there alone and get back the feelings I once had. I’m afraid of them, I’m afraid of you. On so short time everything got so different. So different that I didn’t even know what it meant.
But sometimes it’s better to just live in the moment, the moments of life. The moments only I can remember, and possible you to. Although you never felt it as I did, I hope you still can remember. And I know you do, because you miss it, just in another way than I do. I don’t believe in faith. But sometimes maybe I should, so I don’t go on and do stupid things, things that hurts myself more the people around me, things like this. Heartbroken, and sitting here. I don’t want you to now it, but you do. And you still call me, hoping that tings would turn back to normal again, but I can’t, I can’t let you inn, not now, not yet. And even if I would, it wouldn’t be the same. It would just have been two friends hanging around, not one girl and one boy….
There are so many things I just wish that you understood. I’m not going to tell you, because if you never got it you never will. I rather listen to your silent than your explanations. Although I want you to talk, I want you to talk forever, to me. Because I would listen, listen to every word, every word that you’d whispered, shouted, and told me. But that would be just like wishing for rain, standing in a dessert.
It was a love story, you and I. Or at least I wanted it to be. But it ended just like in the fairytales, and without the happy ending. I’m not going to cry, I’m not going to waste my tears on you. But how long will this last, this feeling of emptiness? I’m getting restless of it. But nothing can compare when you hold around me, even if it’s whit love or as a friend.
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